BEG, BORROW OR STEAL (BBC2)

Jamie Theakston:
 Where do you think Cambridge University is?

Contestant:
 Geography isn't my strong point.

Jamie Theakston:
 There's a clue in the title.

Contestant:
  Leicester

LATE SHOW (BBC MIDLANDS )

Alex Trelinski:
 What is the capital of Italy ?

Contestant:
  France .

Trelinski:
  France is another country. Try again.

Contestant:
 Oh, um, Benidorm.

Trelinski:
 Wrong, sorry, let's try another question.
  In which country is the Parthenon?

Contestant:
 Sorry, I don't know.

Trelinski:
 Just guess a country then.

Contestant:
  Paris .

THE WEAKEST LINK (BBC2)

Anne Robinson:
 Oscar Wilde, Adolf Hitler and Jeffrey Archer have all written books about their experiences in what: - Prison, or the Conservative Party?

Contestant:
 The Conservative Party.

BEACON RADIO ( WOLVERHAMPTON )

DJ Mark:
 For 10, what is the nationality of the Pope?

Ruth from Rowley Regis:
 I think I know that one. Is it Jewish?

UNIVERSITY CHALLENGE

Bamber Gascoyne:
 What was Gandhi's first name?

Contestant:
 Goosey?

GWR FM ( Bristol )

Presenter:
 What happened in Dallas on November 22, 1963?

Contestant:
 I don't know, I wasn't watching it then.

PHIL WOOD SHOW (BBC RADIO? MANCHESTER )

Phil:
 What's 11 squared?

Contestant:
 I don't know.

Phil:
 I'll give you a clue. It's two ones with a two in the middle.

Contestant:
 Is it five?

RICHARD AND JUDY

Richard:
 Which American actor is married to Nicole Kidman?

Contestant:
 Forrest Gump.

RICHARD AND JUDY

Richard:
 On which street did Sherlock Holmes live?

Contestant:
 Er. ... ...

Richard:
 He makes bread . . .

Contestant:
 Er .. .......

Richard:
 He makes cakes . . .

Contestant:
  Kipling Street ?

LINCS FM PHONE-IN

Presenter:
 Which is the largest Spanish-speaking country in the world?

Contestant:
  Barcelona .

Presenter:
 I was really after the name of a country.

Contestant:
 I'm sorry, I don't know the names of any countries in Spain ..

BBC NORFOLK

Stewart White:
 Who had a worldwide hit with What A Wonderful World?

Contestant:
 I don't know.

Stewart White:
 I'll give you some clues: what do you call the part between your hand and your elbow?

Contestant:
 Arm

Stewart White:
 Correct. And if you're not weak, you're...?

Contestant:
 Strong.

Stewart White:
 Correct - and what was Lord Mountbatten's first name?

Contestant:
 Louis

Stewart White:
 Well, there we are then. So who had a worldwide hit with the song What A Wonderful World?

Contestant:
 Frank Sinatra?

NATIONAL LOTTERY (BBC1)

Question:
 What is the world's largest continent?

Contestant:
 The Pacific..

ROCK FM ( PRESTON )

Presenter:
 Name a film starring Bob Hoskins that is also the name of a famous painting by Leonardo da Vinci.

Contestant:
 Who Framed Roger Rabbit?

THE BIGGEST GAME IN TOWN (ITV)

Steve Le Fevre:
 What was signed, to bring World War I to an end in 1918?

Contestant:
 Magna Carta?

JAMES O'BRIEN SHOW (LBC)

James O'Brien:
 How many kings of England have been called Henry?

Contestant:
 Er, well, I know there was a Henry the Eighth .. ER. ER ... Three?

CHRIS SEARLE SHOW (BBC RADIO BRISTOL )

Chris Searle:
 In which European country is Mount Etna ?

Caller:
  Japan .

Chris Searle:
 I did say which European country, so in case you didn't hear that, I can let you try again.

Caller:
 Er ........... Mexico ?

PAUL WAPPAT (BBC RADIO NEWCASTLE )

Paul Wappat:
 How long did the Six-Day War between Egypt and Israel last?

Contestant (long pause):
 Fourteen days.

DARYL DENHAM'S DRIVETIME (VIRGIN RADIO)

Daryl Denham:
 In which country would you spend shekels?

Contestant:
  Holland ?

Daryl Denham:
 Try the next letter of the alphabet..

Contestant:
  Iceland ? Ireland ?

Daryl Denham: (helpfully)
 It's a bad line. Did you say Israel ?

Contestant:
 No.

PHIL WOOD SHOW (BBC GMR)

Phil Wood:
 What 'K' could be described as the Islamic Bible?

Contestant:
 Er... ..... ..

Phil Wood:
 It's got two syllables . . . Kor .

Contestant:
 Blimey?

Phil Wood:
 Ha ha ha ha, no. The past participle of run. .

Contestant:
 (Silence)

Phil Wood:
 OK, try it another way. Today I run, yesterday I . . ..

Contestant:
 Walked?

THE VAULT

Melanie Sykes:
 What is the name given to the condition where the sufferer can fall asleep at any time?

Contestant:
 Nostalgia.

LUNCHTIME SHOW (BRMB)

Presenter:
 What religion was Guy Fawkes?

Contestant:
 Jewish.

Presenter:
 That's close enough.

STEVE WRIGHT IN THE AFTERNOON (BBC RADIO 2)

Wright:
 Johnny Weissmuller died on this day.. Which jungle-swinging character clad only in a loin cloth did he play?

Contestant:
 Jesus.

(Courtesy of Thorny Normy)